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Mewsings from Henri of Twin Brook
Spokescat of Hamden
February, 2007
Meows, dear readers!
I thought you'd like to know that I have my very own website and invite you all to visit me and my feline friends (with occasional mentions of my canine housemate, Ashley) at http://www.henriscorner.com/. Most recently, I have a story to tell you about the bakesale fundraiser for the D*g Park. Clarence and I disguised ourselves as Dachshunds and.... well, go to my website to read on!
Henri of Twin Brook
Meow and good evening.
Here is a brief write-up about my very busy schedule.
The Perils of Fame
No sooner had spring arrived, when the demands on this cat's time and talents erupted like a volcano! As Hamden's Feline Animal Control Officer I had expected my services would be required more often as the temperature increased; however, I am hardly able to catch my breath these days. Often I am asked to participate in or organize functions.
It all started with the Memorial Day Parade. The members of the the Hamden Dog Park at Bassett were asked to participate in the march and naturally, because of my considerable talents as a photographer, I was asked to march along with the dogs and take pictures. It didn't occur to me at the time when I had accepted the challenge, that marching within the ranks of the dogs, I would be reduced to photographing dog butts!
A few weeks after the parade I was asked to participate in the fundraiser which was to be held at the dog park. With a bit of begging and pleading, I agreed to bake a few batches of my very famous brownies. My "paws of fire" tackled the job with vigor and purpose. We sold all of the brownies and made a little money to help purchase doggy toilet bags. Since the mutts won't use litter pans, other means of disposal had to be found in order to keep the park clean. Hopefully, no more demands will be made on my time as I must focus my attention on our garden at home. Without my direction and advice, it would become a jungle filled with plants other than catnip and other fragrant herbs.
Henri of Twin Brook
November 5, 2004
Meows from Henri of Twin Brook. This is my report on the Halloween Party held at the d*g park. (Pictures here including Ashley in ridiculous twinkling hat)
Halloween Party Went to the D*gs
My housemate Helen, reminded me that it had been some time since I had been to the D*g Park at Bassett in Hamden. As spokescat and feline animal control officer, it would be in the best interests of all catdom and the citizens of this fair city to get my tail over to the park and see what mischief the mutts have been doing with their paws.
The day I chose to view the park was Halloween, October 31, 2004. What a foolish cat I was! I never thought that an ordinary creature like a d*g would endeavor to wear costumes and pretend to be something they are not! As soon as I stepped out of the automobile, I saw a d*g with wings attached to his back! Either he was masquerading as an insect of some kind or an angel. When I asked the animal about it, he merely shrugged his shoulders and barked, "I really don't know what I'm supposed to be. My persons didn't tell me." He turned tail then and pranced off to the gate, eager to join the pack of animals cavorting in the fallen leaves.
It was not a good start. Many d*gs were racing around, dangling remnants of fabric from their necks and backs. Some of the mutts managed to keep their Halloween persona intact, but most seemed to be oblivious as to how ridiculous they all appeared to this cat. Ashley, our house dog, wore a little hat which had twinkling lights on it. It really wasn't a costume. I saw a d*g dressed as a convict, a bee, a pumpkin and a ladybug! How silly! No self-respecting cat would have put up with such humiliation! I would never permit my persons to dress me in an atrocious costume and parade me around town! Ashley, of course, is too naive to realize how ridiculous she appears to feline and human.
"Everyone said I looked very, very beautiful," she barked. (No one said she looked beautiful. No one said much of anything. There were some complaints from some d*gs about how uncomfortable their costumes were.)
"I won a whole bunch of prizes for my costume!" (No prizes were awarded that I heard about.....although each canine got a treat at the gate when leaving the park.)
In spite of the mutts, the park looked very nice. Vibrant leaves were strewn across the ground, their colors enhanced by sunlight. The park had decorated itself with the beauty of the fall season, brilliant foliage, bright sunshine, groups of humans gathered together to chat and watch the antics of their pets at play. I guess that's what the park is all about...
That night I put on my favorite costume, Eliza from the musical play, "My Fair Lady," and took to the streets. This year, none of my feline acquaintances laughed or snickered as I walked by. Last year, a good right paw to the chops had diminished their urge to ridicule. Frankly, I looked fantastic!
May 19, 2004
The Big Fund Raiser!
Helen of Bel Air meowing to the Editor:
I knew when Henri walked through the kitchen door, his ears flattened against his head and his mouth open showing his fangs and teeth, that he was very, very upset. He sped past me, nearly knocking me down, went into the bedroom and slid under the bed.
"What's wrong with Henri?" I meowed to Ashley who had also rushed through the opened door, a huge grin on the mutt's face.
"I don't know. I don't care either..I had a wonderful time at the dog park! I was the most beautifulist and the smartyist and the bestest dog there. I had so much fun! I won all kinds of prizes! See! See this ball! I won that! I did! I did ! Cuz I am so smart and so intelligent. I am! I really am! And all the boy dogs are in love with me!"
"I'm delighted to hear that, Ashley, but what happened to get Henri so upset? Was it the rabbit suit he wore to the park? I thought it might be too warm since it was made of polyester fabric....Or did the brownies get all funny and gooey because of the heat?"
"I dunno. I wasn't watching Henri or his brownies. They wouldn't let me eat any of them because they were for people only but I won a package of biscotti." Ashley sniffed the air and assumed a regal stance. "Biscottis are biscuits prepared in Italy for us dogs with classy tastes.
"Is that a fact?" I hissed.. "Did anyone buy Henri's books? That's what I want to know!"
"I don't think so," barked Ashley. "No one wants a book written by a silly cat! Peoples would be better off spending their money on dog toys and biscuits."
I smacked the mutt on the nose being careful not to extend my claws too far. She makes such a fuss when I scratch her nose. I left her in the kitchen playing with the ball she won for the obedience game. Obedience from Ashley? That's a joke!
Only after a lot of coaxing did Henri stick his head out from under the bed. "I have never been so humiliated," he growled. "Never again will I put my paw to key board for that awful d*g park. My 'paws of fire' will never bake another brownie to benefit that dratted park! I will never don another disguise so I can travel freely among the canines!"
I nodded. "I understand a d*g named Tucker chewed the ears off your bunny suit."
Henri hissed. "Wires and all! But that ridiculous act pales when I think about how few people appreciate my literary genius! How could they not know of my great talent! And how will I face my friends? I want to die!"
"Don't get carried away, Henri!" I growled. "It's not the end of the world you know. Us cats know of your greatness as a writer. You meow about it all the time....."
"Tell me, Helen. What should I do with all those books that didn't sell? Where will they be stored? Tell me that!" He sneered at me. "I doubt you have any idea about that!"
At that moment Ashley sauntered into the bedroom. "They could be put out with the weekly trash collection," she barked, brightly. Unfortunately, she got a little too close to Henri's right paw.
The doctor said that Ashley's injuries are painful but not lethal. She will have to wear band aids on her nose for awhile until the wounds are completely healed. Take that to the d*g park, Ashley!
Editor responds:
Dear Helen,
Since Henri won't come out from under the bed and you had to relay the news from your household in his stead, may I ask you please to give him my best wishes and tell him his brownies, baked with his paws of fire, are, without doubt, the best in the universe. That might help... and it's true.
In addition, I apologize to him that the visitors to the Dog Park fundraiser were so oblivious, uncultured, and lacking in good taste that only twelve of them were discriminating enough to recognize brilliance and purchase his heirloom stories of the dog park as recounted in the book "The Real Meow! A Cat's Eye View of the Hamden Dog Park at Bassett!" by his very own self, the esteemed Henri of Twin Brook. Everyone else simply has no idea what a treat they have missed. They could, of course, redeem themselves - there are still some copies available at $7 each (email Henri).
I hope Henri recovers from his snit soon. Otherwise Ashley will be very bored, even if free from scratches, and you will have to continue trying to keep the peace (although you do it so well!).
Purrs,
The Editor
P.S. Please tell Henri that the new plum tree at the park is delightful and has already been baptized very thoroughly by the appreciative canines.
May 5, 2004
Dear Editor,
Henri snuck out of the house and went over to the Hamden Garden Center. He had saved up his allowance and bought a new tree for the dog park. It is a plum tree with maroon leaves and pretty white flowers. They told him it was quite hardy and would grow to be about 11 feet high. I'm wondering if we can plant it near the pussy willow tree and put a little fence around it. If you don't think it would be appropriate, we will plant it in our front yard. He was hoping to get a pussy willow tree but they were all gone.
Eleanor
February 9, 2004
Dear Editor,
Henri told me he would like you to read his collection of mews before publication. He has already set them up in book form and has designed a cover. He would like very much to have some dog biscuit recipes sent to him at my email address. He will then incorporate them into the book.
He is very busy with it. He called Staples for prices but because they didn't understand his meows, they hung up on him. He was in a terrible snit for the rest of the day.
Thank you very much.
Eleanor
January 29, 2004
Purrs,
My housemate, Helen of Bel Aire, has informed me in her snippy way, that d*gs do not have hooves. She claims that they have paws. Cats have paws. I was not aware that mutts possess paws but I'm not about to argue with Helen concerning this matter. It should read, I suppose, "the thundering paws". Doesn't sound very threatening......
Henri of Twin Brook
January 28, 2004
Meows from Henri of Twin Brook.
Here is my latest report on the dog park. It is something that every dog owner should heed and take the necessary precautions.
The Dangers of the Dog Park
Because I am a conscientious cat and the feline animal control officer of Hamden, Connecticut, I am obliged to visit the Hamden Dog Park whenever possible. Believe me, it is no fun for a cat to be squeezed into the back seat of an automobile with a smelly mutt named Ashley. During my last few visits, it came to my attention that the Dog Park can be a very dangerous place to be, especially for cats, who wouldn't go there anyway, but for the humans who accompany the pooches to this place of unbridled behavior. As I have reported previously, canine behavior has not improved or been altered for the better since my first treks to the park. I fear greatly for the individual humans who venture bravely into the area without any thought as to the terrors which might befall them. I am especially concerned for my own persons who are responsible for filling my food dish everyday and cleaning the kitty litter box.
The d*gs run about, without any regard for the humans who are standing about in small groups. I could hear the yips and yaps of the canine pack racing through the thicket of trees and underbrush. I saw several mutts smash into hapless humans, never stopping or even pausing to inquire about their condition. Still they thundered on, their hooves pounding the earth, sending up swirls of dust and after a rain, muddy sprays. How many humans perished under the thundering hooves of dogs, I cannot meow, but my feline friends in the area of the dog park have told me that the ambulance rushes back and forth several times a week to retrieve the broken bodies of dog owners....Humans, beware!
October 28, 2003
Meows!
That Ashley!!!!
Most d*gs who are two years old are well aware of the fact that cats, by their very nature, require frequent and long periods of rest and relaxation. Ashley, my canine housemate is of course one of the few exceptions. Yesterday, she came bounding into the bedroom where I was sleeping soundly, my hind feet propped up on the pillows, my paws (all four of them) pointed at the ceiling. This is the feline position of deep meditation, sometimes referred to as the "sacred nap of rejuvenation." Her harsh growl awakened me. I leapt to my feet, ready to defend my territory. "What?" I hissed. "What do you want, Ashley? Can't you tell when a cat is sleeping?"
"You're always sleeping, Henri. I have to talk to you about something important," whined Ashley. "You're the only one who can help."
"Well, what is it?" I mewed softly, trying to keep the anger out of my meow. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and smoothed my whiskers.
"I would like to have everyone who comes to the DOG PARK to wear name tags, so I would know everyone by name." The mutt grinned at me in that toothy manner that d*gs learn before they are out of puphood. "So many come to the PARK that I have trouble trying to remember who is who........"
I shook my head in disbelief. "You want me to get on the computer, use my hacking skills and find out the names of the members of the R-Dog Club of Hamden? Impossible! It can't be done! It's against the law! I could do jail time if I got caught!"
"I don't think so," barked Ashley. "Most likely you would be sent to one those shelters where they put putty tats out of their misery. Of course that could happen too, if I informed our persons about that plant that ended upside down on the floor, the pot smashed into teeny weeny pieces....."
What could I do? I had to get the names of the membership. That wasn't too difficult to do since I am really very proficient in computer skills and internet usage. I looked over the list, shaking my head in despair. How do I transfer the the names onto wearable tags?
Last night, I searched the neighborhood meowing my way through every back yard. Like an angel from the heavens, Penelope, my old friend, came running out of her home, slightly out of breath. "I think I can help you, Henri! I have excellent pawmanship! Do you have the ink and little cards with pins on the back?"
Quickly, I ran home and lugged the bag of papers and bottles of ink back to Penelope's back yard. (Always make these journeys at night, preferably when humanoid life is asleep. They would probably be rather suspicious at the sight of a cat carrying a bag over its shoulder.) My friend and I worked into the night and early morning hours, she writing the names on the tags with her beautiful paw and me, gluing the pins on the back. Tired but happy, I carried my treasure home. The next morning, I presented the name tags to Ashley. She pawed them over, looking at each one with a critical eye. "That's not what I want!" she growled. "These are the names of peoples. I don't care about the peoples. They're just around to bring us dogs back and forth to the DOG PARK! I want name tags for all of my dog friends! Who cares if the peoples have names? They all answer to the same bark!"
No, it is not an accident that all of Ashley's favorite toys got tossed into the bottom of the garbage pail this weekend.
Henri of Twin Brook
May 30, 2003
Meows!
This morning, I was awakened by the sound of electrical appliances being used in the kitchen. Quickly, I bounded out of bed and approached the room with great caution. Ashley was standing at the kitchen table, apron tied neatly about her waist and an electric hand mixture in her paw. She was beating up a batter of something, unknown to me or I believe any other living creature on this planet. "What are you doing, Ashley?" I growled loudly.
"This coming Tuesday night is the meeting of the Dog Park group and I'm baking refreshments for their enjoyment, if you have to know, smarty cat!" "I didn't know dogs attended those meeting, Ashley. Exactly what is it you are preparing for the honored guests? Something edible, I hope....."
Ashley sniffed at me, baring her teeth for a moment. "These are delicious biscuits, just like the biscuits in that box on top of the refrigerator. Only these with have frosting on top. I'm preparing it now; double fudge chocolate glaze. I think it will make the biscuits really good."
I shook my head in disbelief. "Ashley, that box on top of the refrigerator contains d*g biscuits! They are not meant for human consumption! I doubt they will want to eat them with or without chocolate fudge glaze!"
"I can't believe you said that, Henri! Why wouldn't they want to eat them? They're nutritious and very tasty! I will probably be awarded a medal or something for making these up! I will become very famous all over the world for my biscuits with double fudge chocolate glaze! You just wait and see!" In her excitement, she knocked the bowl of glaze unto the floor. A dark puddle oozed across the floor. Downcast, she stared at the mess. "Nothing has gone right this week," she whined. "The parade was cancelled and no one got to see me in my new coat with the American flag appliqued on it and I only went to the dog park once this week and Erika scratched me on the nose, yesterday. And now this. I spilled the glaze all over the floor......."
I patted Ashley on the ear. "Never mind, I'll help you clean the floor before our persons come home. Get the mop. And I'll bake up a batch of chocolate chip/oatmeal cookies for Tuesday night."
Ashley sniffed loudly. "Chocolate chip/oatmeal cookies.....how ordinary, how common..." I smacked her one in the chops and went about cleaning the floor, sticky with glaze. I work my paws to the bone and what kind of thanks do I get? A snippy dog who thinks chocolate chip cookies are common! Common indeed! She should have my talents!
Henri of Twin Brook
Editor's comment:
Just as well Henri set her straight... I for one much prefer chocolate chip/oatmeal to dog biscuits, double-fudge chocolate glaze or no! Good thing Henri was there, on top of things as usual, to save the refreshment situation for Tuesday's meeting. Bravo Henri!
May 12, 2003
Meows!
I decided that I, Henri of Twin Brook, should supervise the planting of the tree! Even though the weather looked threatening, I hopped into the back seat of the automobile, out of reach of that slobbering mutt, Ashley, and settled down to an uncomfortable drive to the d*g park. As soon as we had arrived, it started to rain and you know how cats hate rain drops falling on their heads! Nevertheless, I whipped out my trusty digital camera and began snapping pictures of Leo Taylor as he labored away at trying to dig through the rocks and clay. The mighty pussy willow tree is planted! Here is the proof!
Purrs and headbutts, Henri of Twin Brook
By the way, after my careful inspection of the Korean d*gwood, it might well still alive. Give it a little more time. Those d*gwood trees are late bloomers and perhaps, late in getting started. Of course, that's only the opinion of a mere cat.....
May 11, 2003
Hello!
Unbeknownst to Leo and me, Henri of Twin Brook ordered and bought a pussy willow tree which he insists must be planted at the Hamden Dog Park. He paid for the tree out of his allowance. It is now in the back of Leo's automobile. Is it alright if we go ahead and plant it? We will water it a few times this week to make sure the roots are kept moist.
Regards, Eleanor and Leo
Never, never, let a cat have access to a credit card or the internet...
Editor responds:
I'd love to see a pussy willow there! The newly-planted Korean DOGwood doesn't seem to be waking up this spring. Tell Henri he's very sweet and thoughtful! Merci.
April 16, 2003
Meows again,
I was informed by my person, that no medals were awarded at the Opening Bark at the Dog Park. Ashley barks some whoppers sometimes....
Editor's response:
I hope that medals (or pinwheels?) will be awarded when the Paws 'n Effect people come back on a better day, sometime soon.
April 14, 2003
Meows!
I can't tell you how upset I am that those wonderful cakes and cupcakes I baked for the "Opening Bark at the Dog Park" did not sell! I worked my paws to the bone, slaving over a hot oven and what gratitude did I get? Ashley told me she was just too busy to sell those wonderful creations! "I had such a wonderful time at the party! Everyone was there! All my boyfriends were at the park and we ran and played and then we had ice cream and biscuits and some people took lots of pictures! I had two ice cream cups and I shared a whole lot of other dogs' ice cream! It was really fun and I got all dirty and wet and everything! I had a great time and I got lots of prizes and medals. I was judged best dog, most beautifulist dog, most smartest dog, most obedientist dog and a whole bunch of others, too!", she squealed.
"Well", I growled, "I'm glad you had a good time! I noticed you didn't spend a lot of time trying to sell my Feline Fancies for People. We have locker full of those things! Don't tell me to give them to the poor starving cats in China. Cats don't eat those kind of treats!" "I don't think anyone really liked them....That's why they didn't buy them....," Ashley whined. "Bite your tongue, d*g," I hissed. "If they knew who had baked those delicacies, they would have stormed the table, begging for just crumbs! After all, I Henri of Twin Brook have a certificate of merit from the Feline College of Culinary Arts! Not every cat can get admitted there, you know!" "Yeah, I guess..." barked Ashley. "Maybe you could sell the leftovers at a tag sale, next summer....Just a suggestion." "Oh, shut up!" I turned tail and left the room.
-Henri
Editor's response:
I assure you that after Dawn and I finished another couple of hours of fundraising at the park again yesterday, there was only one partial pack of those delicious brownies left, and Dieter and I had them for tea! Scrumptious!
You should have come!!! I didn't see any chihuahuas...
Thank you (and your persons) for all your very hard work on baking, balloons, pictures, and banner (we'll have to use it next year). I think we made about $1200, which is very good.
April 8, 2003
Meow!
I have been working my paws off about the opening bark of the Hamden d*g park at Bassett. Every day there are more demands made on my time and talents! I am a very busy cat! I am in the process of preparing an article for Claw.org for publication but after constant nagging, I agreed to make a banner for the d*g park opening bark. Since my persons could not figure out how to make the new printer perform this function, it was left to me to discover the secret! After many attempts, I Henri of Twin Brook was able to produce a reasonable looking banner, eight pages long, in color. I hope you appreciate my efforts! My paws have grown weary......
With purrs,
Henri of Twin Brook
Balloons, cakes, cookies and award pinwheels. ....I will be exhausted!
Editor responds:
Excellent! Now if you can please turn your considerable talents to making sure the sun shines and the temperature is at least 50 degrees, we would appreciate it.
April 5, 2003
Purrs!
I Henri of Twin Brook have agreed to supervise and provide with my paws of fire, the baked goods as discussed. I shall prepare cookies and cakes for the purpose of fund-raising for the d*g park. It is truly a blessing for us cats to have these animals secured if even for a mere few hours a week. I shall probably attend the gala celebration but I will come incognito as a chihuahua. Please, if you should recongnize my disguise, pretend that you don't know me........
Meows, Henri of Twin Brook
Editor responds:
Hmmm. Can we really trust you to provide wholesome cakes and cookies for the d*gs? Or must we treat these delicacies with suspicion, and maybe use whichever handy chihuahua we can find as a taster?
Henri's response:
I am an honorable cat!!!!
March 23 2003
A D*G WHAT?
For the past week I, Henri of Twin Brook, have been listening to our d*g Ashley yipping and yapping about the house! "Oh, Happy Dogs, Oh, Happy We! We're as Happy as came Be! At the Dog Park! At the Dog Park!"
"What are you barking about, Ashley?" I hissed. "You've been jumping around like a jackrabbit all week. What's your problem?" "I'm so happy! I'm so happy!" crooned Ashley. "We're going to have a party! We dogs are putting on a party at the new Dog Spa in Hamden! I can't wait! I'm so excited!"
"You're going to have a WHAT at the WHICH?" I meowed loudly. "I've never heard of a d*g spa, Ashley! You made that up. And who is going to give this party? I hope it's not paid for out of my allowance..You'd be a very sorry canine if that should happen." Ashley grinned at me, showing all her teeth. "I renamed the Bassett Dog Park. I now call it the Hamden Health Spa for Canines and Others. I thought that sounded more elegant...Canine means us dogs. Others refers to those who clean up after us dogs....We're going to have a party on Saturday, April 12, 2003. We're going to have cookies and ice cream and cupcakes and games and dog biscuits and all kinds of neat things. Maybe they'll give out ribbons for the biggest dog or the prettiest dog or the most intelligent dog. "I'll probably win a whole lot of ribbons...." squealed Ashley.
"Well, you certainly won't win a ribbon for the third category," I growled. "You could come and take notes," barked Ashley. "Maybe you could write an article for that club you belong to. What's it called?" mused Ashley. "It's called Claw, if you really must know," I hissed. "And when we have a party, we really have a party! At our Halloween celebration, I came dressed as Eliza from My Fair Lady. All the cats on Twin Brook thought I looked amazing!" "A real drag Queen, huh?" snickered Ashley. I smacked her one on the nose. A d*g has to learn to control her barks...but I could tell I had unfortunately raised a dangerous point with the mutt. "I could dress up as Cleopatra, Queen of the Nile." Her eyes glazed over. "More likely you would be Cleopatra, Queen of the Compost," I suggested. "That wasn't very nice, Henri," whined Ashley. "What's a compost?" "Never mind," I meowed and finished grooming my ears. A cat can only listen to so many barks...
Henri of Twin Brook
March 17 2003
Hamden Animal Friends Now at the Animal Shelter Need Homes
This morning I was awakened from my much needed nap to accompany my two persons and d*g Ashley to the Merryfield health clinic to appraise two dogs who were in need of homes. They were just d*gs, however, so I was mystified as to why anyone of breeding would be concerned about these animals. I reluctantly agreed to go with them and supervise the photography. Under my direction, many photos were taken of the mutts.
(Editor's note: these animals have been adopted)
Interested in adoption? Call Jean Murray, Hamden's Animal Control Officer at her office at Merryfield Animal Hospital on Shepard Avenue (203 230-4080, 8-4 M-F).
Purrs,
Henri of Twin Brook,
Assistant Feline Animal Control Officer of Hamden, CT
(I love titles!)
January 2003
To whom it may concern:
Domesticating the D*g.... by Henri of Twin Brook
I have done it! I have taught Ashley Taylor to be a responsible, domesticated animal! With soft purrs and meows, I have finally gotten through to his mutt!
Purrs,
Henri of Twin Brook
December 2002
To whom it may concern:
About the Cat Park.... by Henri of Twin Brook
About a month ago, I was listening to d*g Ashley barking to our neighbor d*g Emmett. Ashley was discussing the merits of a certain location called "THE DOG PARK". I had never heard one meow about such a place and was curious......"Ashley," I purred, "please tell me all about this place known as the "DOG PARK". "Oh, it's wonderful!" barked Ashley. "I've met such great friends there! Any dog of importance in the canine world goes to the DOG PARK! I'm the most popular pooch in Hamden because of the DOG PARK! Every dog of any importance knows my name and knows my bark and I might add, knows of my great beauty! I live for the DOG PARK!"
"Well, obviously you like this place," I hissed. "It certainly has done wonders in expanding your ego! Too bad it hasn't expanded your intelligence! But then you are a d*g...." "You're just jealous!" snapped Ashley, baring her teeth. A quick, right feline paw to the canine snout tempered her outburst. "I mean," she barked softly, "I will ask the nice persons with the DOG PARK to make a cat park for all the kitties in Hamden." "Let me think about it, first," I meowed. "A park might not be suitable for the feline temperament." Of course the practical solution to the question as to whether or not a CAT PARK would be appropriate for feline habitation could only be answered if I, Henri of Twin Brook took it upon myself to view Ashley's favorite place, myself, in order to appraise the suitability of such a recreational facility.
On the next venture to the DOG PARK, I secreted myself in the back seat of the station wagon, beyond the reach of Ashley's slobbering tongue. I have yet to convince the d*g that cats do not require nor desire having their faces washed by canines. The ride in the station wagon seemed endless. Ashley was overwrought with joy as we approached the beloved site. As the vehicle drove into the parking lot, the mutt became totally unraveled and lunged through the opened door and bounded toward the park's gate. I sat there, licking my fur back into place......I sat there and watched as one d*g after another made his/her way into that den of pleasure and abandon....
Never has a cat been as shocked as I! ....Thirty minutes of observing the pack of canines who ran, chased, rolled, howled, nipped, slobbered and behaved in the most disgusting manner was quite enough to dispel and notion that a cat park would be of any value to the feline population! Cats do not wildly chase each other from one end of an enclosure to the other for no apparent reason! A cat chases after prey! A cat chases the enemy who threatens the sanctity of the home! Nor do we roll around in the dirt and mud, soiling our beautiful fur! We might roll around in a dusty garden to discourage the misinformed flea from making our coat its home.....but never would we dream of encasing ourselves in a coat of watery filth and grime. D*gs, on the other paw seem to delight in making themselves as unappetizing as possible and then bringing their undesirable selves into the car and house, tracking the debris they have gathered in those glorious moments of play in the park, throughout the home, including the bed, the sofa, the chair! Shame on them!
Regardless of what Ashley has barked, we feline citizens of Hamden, do not need a CAT PARK! It is truly beneath our dignity!
Henri of Twin Brook, Spokescat of Hamden
Comments about the park from people and dogs
But here is someone who doesn't care two hoots about d*g parks. Or anything.
Improving the quality of life in our town
Hamden R-DOG is a committee of Hamden Community Playground, Inc.